up at this hour. watching madonna's drowned world tour video. she just displayed her first attempt at guitar.

i met the most gorgeous men at the City event tonight (last night?). it went from 6 to about 9:15. great opportunity to meet some people, network. particularly, April, the women's division booker. she seemed genuinely interested in working with me in depth. let's see if she can get me some work. hmm, i wouldn't mind being a booker.

eddie was right, i'm not going to get any sleep tonight.

i must continue about the delicious man flesh my eyes consumed earlier. absolutely decadent. go on and objectify them. break it down to the basics. we all do. i had three talking to me at once. no idea what the conversation was, even tho i was doing most of the talking. so distracted was i. let me clarify: gorgeous, sound, straight, male models. believe it or not, they were all very down to earth. good solid heads on their shoulders, able to carry on a conversation with more than two syllable words. a stark contrast from jailbait boy. he smokes far too much weed. (no comments, thank you). not that i fault him for that, he did just turn 17 in may, has a bit of life to experience yet.

going into this industry you have to take it seriously and look at it as a business, which it is. there are those few kids that get free rides for winning a contest, being "discovered" some such thing. but the drive, the consistency, the professionalism, will get you a lot further than simply smiling pretty and letting someone else take care of the details.

grrr. i'm making something out of this. it's a calling, it's in my blood. i've been groomed nearly my entire life for this (thanks mom, pshha). i will thrive, i will improve, i will make some good money, dammit! with my look i could be doin this until i'm 30. it starts here. it starts now. with this intention. i will make it work for me.

madonna rocks my socks. a perfect example of a woman knowing what she wants and going out and making it happen.

---

Last Five
treasure - Thursday, Sept. 06, 2006
need - Sunday, May. 22, 2005
where is here - Friday, May. 13, 2005
save me. - Monday, May. 09, 2005
nonsense - Sunday, May. 01, 2005

ALL