I just sent an email off to Mark. Jeezus, I wish I could put in, "GROW THE FUCK UP!!" But I can't because he's saving all of them to use against me. Why does a man who is 37 years old need to be such a fucking weak sniveling baby and come to me for money? Why can't he "handle" working full time like everyone else. He worked 10 years in a proffesional field for chrissakes! I'm not going to him for money. I'm not attacking him. I cannot fucking believe how pathetic he is. Seriously, it is ridiculous. I said so too as politically and as unoffending as I could.

He's going to Italy for a two week vacation for the love of god. And he has the audacity to ask me for money? Is he fucking insane? He doesn't even work full time. He is "self-employed" and works half time at best. I wish I could borrow money from family when I have no way of paying them back just so I can go traips about Italian beaches with my baby.

Oye. This is making me old. God forgive me for ever getting involved with him.

I need more lovely emails, beautiful thoughts, and kind people in my life. Not any more of pain and headaches. I've worked so hard. I've come so far. I need my happiness. I deserve peace and joy. I need a fucking little bit of love.

---

Last Five
treasure - Thursday, Sept. 06, 2006
need - Sunday, May. 22, 2005
where is here - Friday, May. 13, 2005
save me. - Monday, May. 09, 2005
nonsense - Sunday, May. 01, 2005

ALL