i seemed to be noticeably skinnier this morning. but the scale said nothing had changed. i think that is not quite right, my perception is changing. i don't think i quite like looking so scrawny.

i don't need to be doing anything other than exactly what i am doing now. i don't need to have a master plan for the next two months. "i will learn the cello, feed the homeless, and learn to tango, while the boy is away." each day brings something new. as i drove to work this morning i noticed two houses I'd never seen before but drive by every day. the sunset was beautiful last night. one cloud the shape of a feather crossing the horizon. each moment, from one to the next. being myself is enough, being with myself is enough. it's new and i'm enjoying it. i'm finding a long lost friend within me. saying hello again to someone i have neglected for far too long.

this morning i tended to my plants. one bamboo stalk survived, i threw the other three out. in with the stones that it is planted in, i found a small sliver of abalone and remembered where it came from. my orchid has new nubs of life growing on it. down by the dirt where the other limbs had withered from overwatering, there is new growth. although the leaves are dusty and have scars on them, it still has life in it and will bloom again when it is ready.

---

Last Five
treasure - Thursday, Sept. 06, 2006
need - Sunday, May. 22, 2005
where is here - Friday, May. 13, 2005
save me. - Monday, May. 09, 2005
nonsense - Sunday, May. 01, 2005

ALL